The second date, when the first-date topics are used up

You said yes to a second date, and now you are on your way there. On the first one, the easy questions did the work: where you grew up, what you do, what you studied. You have already used them. The worry sitting in your bag is a simple one: what will we talk about now?

The good news is that you do not need new topics. You need one thing from last time.

The look

Go a notch more relaxed than the first date. You have already met, so you do not need to prove anything with the outfit.

• Modern: a nice top you like, in a colour that makes you smile, with jeans you can walk in.
• Modest: a comfortable cotton or linen kurta with straight pants or leggings, and a light dupatta only if you like one.
• Hair: open, or a loose braid over one shoulder. Pick whichever you will not need to fix.
• One small detail: a pair of earrings you already own, or a watch. One is enough.

Wear shoes you can walk in for an hour, because of the plan below.

The one confidence move

Bring back one thing your date told you last time, and ask how it went. A sister's exam, a trip they were planning, a new job, a plant they were worried about. Remember it on the way there, and keep it ready.

Asking about it says one quiet thing: I was listening. You do not need to say it out loud.

When there is a pause, do not rush to fill it. Look around and say what you both can see: the tree outside, the old man selling roasted corn, the song playing in the shop. A shared thing in front of you is an easy topic, and it is always there.

What to say first

After the hello, sit or stop walking and say:

"So, did your sister's exam go well?"

Use your own version, with the thing they told you.

If it goes sideways

Suppose you ask and the answer is short, or they seem not to want to talk about it. Smile and say, "Okay, no more questions on that. Tell me the best part of your week instead." Then listen to the answer. A small miss does not need an apology.

One thing to try today

Before tonight, write down on your phone the one thing your date told you last time and the question you will ask about it. Then choose a place where you can walk, not only sit: a park path, a lake edge, a market lane. Walking gives you something to look at together, and it gives the silences somewhere to go.

Each Sunday: one moment coming up this week, the look for it and the one line to say first. Find the moment cards at /moments.